When I was young I thought I wanted to be a teacher. I loved kids and the idea of being surrounded by them, imparting wisdom on the next generations seemed amazing to me.
In highschool I felt drawn to the Ministry and being a minister in the Lutheran church. I had a number of people from different parts of my life all ask if I had considered becoming a minister. At the time I was quite involved in church and various youth groups and my religion was a high priority in my life. I felt like this was a true calling and went off to university, had a great experience but realized after a few years I didn’t feel the calling any more and couldn’t imagine spending 4 more years in school. I was finding more pull towards things that the church traditionally didn’t fit with. Things like the queer community, fetish and sexuality.
While I was at school I worked and managed several food spots in the food court. It was a wonderful experience of working with my fellow students and many of us ended up living together. I really understood my love and desire for organization when making schedules for a business that was open from 10 am to 3 am some days while working around class schedules. Learned a lot about boundaries when I lived, worked, managed and partied with friends, got some lessons on the damaging power of gossip in groups.
After university I worked at a few different restaurants and then a few customer service jobs. I have always advanced quickly in jobs from generic worker to supervisor or manager positions. Quick working brain and deep understanding of how people interact and what they need makes me an amazing leader. Sadly every job, as in most capitalism, doesn’t respect or appreciate good employees and once a good employee feels under appreciated they are out. I didn’t last more than a few years since I would max out on growth in positions and get bored with limited authority to make things work better.
I did more schooling while working these customer service jobs, got a diploma in mediation and negotiation. I adored the communication skills that have always been natural in my life, fine tuning my ability to understand what people say and what they really mean.
People fascinate me, mostly in how much they all struggle to communicate, to speak their minds, and to understand. Words, body language, eye contact, energy, tone, inflections, etc. have always been clear to me and it was fun to learn them from a training position.
Then I found sex work, talk about finding a true calling. The communication skills mixed with reading and understanding people created quick connections with clients who still do sessions with me over 7 years later. There are so many aspects of sex work I love. The human connection, creating a safe space for people to explore the parts of them that don’t fall into the boxes society wants them in, the sexual freedom, educating people on so many things, etc.
My dream job now is to run a brothel type space of sex workers. To use my hands on experience in the industry to train, educate and run an amazing quality space. To allow a diverse group of women to come and work there, and have a great support system. To ensure everyone has the highest knowledge of safety precautions, skills, support, etc. I dream of a big house space where the staff-sex workers, security, maintenance, cleaning etc can come and work in shifts. They would have options to work when space was avail, to commit to a month, 6 months, a year etc and then have some freedom of decoration for their space, types of sessions they provide etc. They would pay a fee to use the space then charge whatever they want for their sessions. They could bring in their own clients as well as take on clients who walk in looking for sessions.
I would love to have spaces for full service sex work, space for content filming or photo shoots, for fetish play, for Domination.
Staff to take care of cleaning, maintenance, laundry service, etc. This would allow the sex workers to focus on their sessions and clients. I would require a sober work space so everyone is in the right space for consent and making choices for themselves.
I love the idea of the business having a black book of sorts, clients that have been vetted, hold a membership that allows them to book in advance or do a walk in with the sex workers that are avail on site that day. The sex workers could bring in their own clients who they vet, and those clients would be allowed to see that provider, but if they wanted to see others, they would have to go through the house process.
We would offer regular testing, have recommended doctors, therapists, accountants, tax people, photographers, etc. available to those that worked for the company. Would offer regular classes on specific fetishes, or Domination sessions, how to pole dance, how to put a condom on with your mouth, etc.
In the current world with so many levels of legality around sex work, not to mention stigma and judgement, this remains a bit of a pipe dream.
I dream often of a world where we can do our jobs and get paid without problems. Where we can be seen for the amazing healing work we provide. Understood that we meet needs that people are missing in their lives-human contact, touch, acceptance, sexual gratification etc.
In this amazing world, a brothel type business like this would be wonderful, helpful, safe, and sustainable. It would combine my love of teaching, educating, providing knowledge and safety. It would provide workers with a low stress work environment that honoured and valued them for all they do. Mutually beneficial financially and emotionally.
I dream of these days!